The time has come. The movers are here, packing away 6 years worth of Singapore. I'm stuck in my bedroom, sitting on the floor trying to get enough signal to surf the net one last time before modem is disconnected.
I'm sad to be leaving. I'm tired - I didn't get to bed until 4am this morning, doing the final cull before the movers arrived. DH arrived back In SIngapore SUnday night, and I mistakenly thought he wouldn't be going to work - or have after hourse commitments. Whoops! Guess it really was up to me to get everything sorted!
Running into school soon for Ms A's class party. Tomorrow MrT has kindergarten graduation!
Think we have one last night in our apartment - sleeping on matresses on the floor! There was some misunderstanding about whether we had hotel booking tonight or not. The movers come back tomorrow afternoon to try and cram everything into the shipping container. Then we have Saturday to clean up the place, and hand keys back to the landlord on Sunday. MrT has a bday party for one of his best friends Sunday afternoon - we go from there to the airport!!!
Crazy!
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Learning from past mistakes
I saw a snippet of a doco about Cambodia yesterday. It captured my attention for a number of reasons, not least the fond memories I have of our trip there in Jan 2004.
The doco raised a number of concerns which suggested that maybe the Khmers haven't learnt from the mistakes of the past which saw their huge empire come crashing down in the 12th(?) century and that despite their great intentions history may end up repeating itself.
The story focused on tourism, and the management of the ancient temples of Angkor Wat and surrounds. Construction of hotels seems to be going on without any controls or forethought. Apparently there are over 100 hotels in Siem Reap constructed, or under construction - and most of them look HUGE! I can't remember if the doco said 8,10, or 12 years ago - there was only ONE hotel. (I'm sure there would have been guesthouses/backpackers etc).
There are environmental issues associated with water pollution, illegal logging, lowering of the water table etc. It seems ridiculous that the province of Siem Reap which is the heart of the tourist trade is the poorest province in the nation. The ranking of Cambodia as second only to Myanmmar as the most corrupt nation in Asia is alarming, but perhaps sheds some light on the great inequities in the country.
What happens to these people when the tourists stop coming??...
The doco raised a number of concerns which suggested that maybe the Khmers haven't learnt from the mistakes of the past which saw their huge empire come crashing down in the 12th(?) century and that despite their great intentions history may end up repeating itself.
The story focused on tourism, and the management of the ancient temples of Angkor Wat and surrounds. Construction of hotels seems to be going on without any controls or forethought. Apparently there are over 100 hotels in Siem Reap constructed, or under construction - and most of them look HUGE! I can't remember if the doco said 8,10, or 12 years ago - there was only ONE hotel. (I'm sure there would have been guesthouses/backpackers etc).
There are environmental issues associated with water pollution, illegal logging, lowering of the water table etc. It seems ridiculous that the province of Siem Reap which is the heart of the tourist trade is the poorest province in the nation. The ranking of Cambodia as second only to Myanmmar as the most corrupt nation in Asia is alarming, but perhaps sheds some light on the great inequities in the country.
What happens to these people when the tourists stop coming??...
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
It's Official
You Are a Werewolf |
 You're unpredictable, moody, and downright freaky. You seem sweet and harmless, until you snap. Then you're a total monster. Very few people can predict if you're going to be Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde. But for you, all your transformations seem perfectly natural. Your greatest power: Your ability to tap into nature Your greatest weakness: Lack of self control You play well with: Vampires |
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Happy Mother's Day
It doesn't matter how many time I see this, it still makes me smile. (But is it all a matter of "ego" *WINK*)
A woman, renewing her driver's license, was asked by the woman recorder to state her occupation.
She hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself.
'What I mean is, ' explained the recorder, 'do you have a job or are you just a ...?'
'Of course I have a job,' snapped the woman.
'I'm a Mum.'
'We don't list 'Mum' as an occupation,
'housewife' covers it,' Said the recorder emphatically.
I forgot all about her story until one day I found myself in the same situation, this time at our own Town Hall. The Clerk was obviously a career woman, poised, efficient, and possessed of a high sounding title like, 'Official Interrogator' or 'Town Registrar.'
'What is your occupation?' she probed.
What made me say it? I do not know. The words simply popped out.
'I'm a Research Associate in the field of Child Development and Human Relations.'
The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in midair and looked up as though she had not heard right.
I repeated the title slowly emphasizing the most significant words. Then I stared with wonder as my pronouncement was written, in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire. 'Might I ask,' said the clerk with new interest, 'just what you do in your field?'
Coolly, without any trace of fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply, 'I have a continuing program of research, (what mother doesn't) In the laboratory and in the field, (normally I would have said indoors and out). I'm working for my Masters, (first the Lord and then the whole family) and already have four credits (all daughters). Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities, (any mother care to disagree?) and I often work 14 hours a day, (24 is more like it). But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers and the rewards are more of a satisfaction rather than just money.'
There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk's voice as she
completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the door.
As I drove into our driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career,
I was greeted by my lab assistants -- ages 13, 7, and 3.
Upstairs I could hear our new experimental model, (a 6 month old baby) in the child development program, testing out a new vocal pattern. I felt I had scored a beat on bureaucracy!
And I had gone on the official records as someone more distinguished and indispensable to mankind than 'just another Mum.'
Motherhood!
What a glorious career!
Especially when there's a title on the door.
A woman, renewing her driver's license, was asked by the woman recorder to state her occupation.
She hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself.
'What I mean is, ' explained the recorder, 'do you have a job or are you just a ...?'
'Of course I have a job,' snapped the woman.
'I'm a Mum.'
'We don't list 'Mum' as an occupation,
'housewife' covers it,' Said the recorder emphatically.
I forgot all about her story until one day I found myself in the same situation, this time at our own Town Hall. The Clerk was obviously a career woman, poised, efficient, and possessed of a high sounding title like, 'Official Interrogator' or 'Town Registrar.'
'What is your occupation?' she probed.
What made me say it? I do not know. The words simply popped out.
'I'm a Research Associate in the field of Child Development and Human Relations.'
The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in midair and looked up as though she had not heard right.
I repeated the title slowly emphasizing the most significant words. Then I stared with wonder as my pronouncement was written, in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire. 'Might I ask,' said the clerk with new interest, 'just what you do in your field?'
Coolly, without any trace of fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply, 'I have a continuing program of research, (what mother doesn't) In the laboratory and in the field, (normally I would have said indoors and out). I'm working for my Masters, (first the Lord and then the whole family) and already have four credits (all daughters). Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities, (any mother care to disagree?) and I often work 14 hours a day, (24 is more like it). But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers and the rewards are more of a satisfaction rather than just money.'
There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk's voice as she
completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the door.
As I drove into our driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career,
I was greeted by my lab assistants -- ages 13, 7, and 3.
Upstairs I could hear our new experimental model, (a 6 month old baby) in the child development program, testing out a new vocal pattern. I felt I had scored a beat on bureaucracy!
And I had gone on the official records as someone more distinguished and indispensable to mankind than 'just another Mum.'
Motherhood!
What a glorious career!
Especially when there's a title on the door.
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Is Ego a bad thing??
I was really hurt by comments/assumptions made by someone I respected (see previous post). I've spent a lot of time thinking about the issue and how (if at all) I should respond to it.
During this time I saw the end of an Oprah show about the Eckhardt Tolle book she is featuring in her book club. I erronously thought it was about the greenhouse effect and ways to reduce the impact of it in your everyday life. No idea where I came up with that!
Anyway, the book is infact a self help book ... and my initial reaction on hearing the man speak and listening to excerpts taken from the book was that it was too "new age" for me - and reminded me of a guy that Oprah featured years ago called ...umm, Gary Zukov (or something similar). I remember thinking at the time that he had a lovely "buddhist like" philosophy and was so gentle and calm - but also out of touch with modern living and technology. He didn't even have a TV. I knew that such a "simple" mindset and way of living wouldn't fit in our high tech home.
Back to Eckhardt. One of the key points mentioned was that people should strive for/accept peace in the moment. It suggested that most often we struggle with this because we are either holding onto thoughts of the past (what if/why etc) or plans for the future which block us from just being happy and at peace in the moment. The reason we do this - we can't forgo our ego.
Hmm ...
After hearing that I realised that continuing to focus on the hurtful words said to me I was just making the pain last longer, and I couldn't "be" happy if I was harbouring these negative emotions. The more I thought about it, the more it hurt. I realised that "retaliation" or rebuttal wasn't going to achieve anything. I needed to let it go. So I deleted the offending emails. I felt better, as I wasn't reminded of the feelings of hurt everytime I opened up my email account.
Later in the day I was on the bus with MrM and the thoughts drifted into my head again. At the same time MrM stood up on my lap, looked me straight in the eye, smiled, then gave me a GREAT big hug. At that moment I understood what "peace in the moment" meant. Talk about the weight of the world being lifted off my shoulders - I nearly started crying all over again ... just because of the joy and relief I felt.
So it felt good...
Then I started to wonder why the comments hurt so much in the first place. Was it pride in my professional status? Was it ego?
I never thought I had a big ego. I never thought I cared too much about what others thought of me. I thought I was a pretty relaxed and independent person. I don't have that many close friendships and that didn't bother me 'cos I was happy in my own skin. Then I started to wonder ... am I actually a typical "martyr" .... sacrificing everything for my kids and family .... giving all of myself to my work (when I am employed!).
I imagine Eckhardt would say that this is all ego. The need to be wanted and valued.
That's where I have a problem ... whats wrong with feeling wanted or valued?? We are not loners. We are not pack animals either. But we do live in communities and family groups. My sense of identity and sense of self is closely linked to the roles I fulfil within my community. I chose to work in a service related industry because it makes me feel good. Does that mean I only feel good when I am recognised for helping others and I constantly seek that recognition? And is that "good" feeling actually pride? I don't think so, but it is a part of me.
I think I need to spend some time on "me". I am feeling so beat up with this move - I feel like I have aged 10yrs in the last 2 mths. I need to take time to reconnect with myself ... and my family. DH has been talking about our new home being a "seachange" for us. I think we need to take the time to find out!
During this time I saw the end of an Oprah show about the Eckhardt Tolle book she is featuring in her book club. I erronously thought it was about the greenhouse effect and ways to reduce the impact of it in your everyday life. No idea where I came up with that!
Anyway, the book is infact a self help book ... and my initial reaction on hearing the man speak and listening to excerpts taken from the book was that it was too "new age" for me - and reminded me of a guy that Oprah featured years ago called ...umm, Gary Zukov (or something similar). I remember thinking at the time that he had a lovely "buddhist like" philosophy and was so gentle and calm - but also out of touch with modern living and technology. He didn't even have a TV. I knew that such a "simple" mindset and way of living wouldn't fit in our high tech home.
Back to Eckhardt. One of the key points mentioned was that people should strive for/accept peace in the moment. It suggested that most often we struggle with this because we are either holding onto thoughts of the past (what if/why etc) or plans for the future which block us from just being happy and at peace in the moment. The reason we do this - we can't forgo our ego.
Hmm ...
After hearing that I realised that continuing to focus on the hurtful words said to me I was just making the pain last longer, and I couldn't "be" happy if I was harbouring these negative emotions. The more I thought about it, the more it hurt. I realised that "retaliation" or rebuttal wasn't going to achieve anything. I needed to let it go. So I deleted the offending emails. I felt better, as I wasn't reminded of the feelings of hurt everytime I opened up my email account.
Later in the day I was on the bus with MrM and the thoughts drifted into my head again. At the same time MrM stood up on my lap, looked me straight in the eye, smiled, then gave me a GREAT big hug. At that moment I understood what "peace in the moment" meant. Talk about the weight of the world being lifted off my shoulders - I nearly started crying all over again ... just because of the joy and relief I felt.
So it felt good...
Then I started to wonder why the comments hurt so much in the first place. Was it pride in my professional status? Was it ego?
I never thought I had a big ego. I never thought I cared too much about what others thought of me. I thought I was a pretty relaxed and independent person. I don't have that many close friendships and that didn't bother me 'cos I was happy in my own skin. Then I started to wonder ... am I actually a typical "martyr" .... sacrificing everything for my kids and family .... giving all of myself to my work (when I am employed!).
I imagine Eckhardt would say that this is all ego. The need to be wanted and valued.
That's where I have a problem ... whats wrong with feeling wanted or valued?? We are not loners. We are not pack animals either. But we do live in communities and family groups. My sense of identity and sense of self is closely linked to the roles I fulfil within my community. I chose to work in a service related industry because it makes me feel good. Does that mean I only feel good when I am recognised for helping others and I constantly seek that recognition? And is that "good" feeling actually pride? I don't think so, but it is a part of me.
I think I need to spend some time on "me". I am feeling so beat up with this move - I feel like I have aged 10yrs in the last 2 mths. I need to take time to reconnect with myself ... and my family. DH has been talking about our new home being a "seachange" for us. I think we need to take the time to find out!
Tasteeeeee
Have you ever wondered what the alphabet tasted like - particularly the letter "E"?
Ask MrM.
Apparently "E" is very high in fibre, and hard to digest. It greeted me when I changed his nappy last night. There, sitting amongst the stinky stuff was a small white alphabet bead.
I have no idea when he consumed it. I assume it came from MsA's room and fell onto the floor while we were cleaning up. MrM has a habit of pursing his mouth and rolling his tongue around so that it always looks like he has something in his mouth. I've for the most part given up checking if he has something stored in his mouth ... I guess I need to be more diligent after all.
Ask MrM.
Apparently "E" is very high in fibre, and hard to digest. It greeted me when I changed his nappy last night. There, sitting amongst the stinky stuff was a small white alphabet bead.
I have no idea when he consumed it. I assume it came from MsA's room and fell onto the floor while we were cleaning up. MrM has a habit of pursing his mouth and rolling his tongue around so that it always looks like he has something in his mouth. I've for the most part given up checking if he has something stored in his mouth ... I guess I need to be more diligent after all.
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Rumours
Oh the power of the whispered rumour. What was that game we played as children? ... chinese whispers ... remember how the message relayed was always changed?
I've just had my own "chinese whisper" experience, and it hurts.
Suffice it to say that someone (who I thought would know better!) I know from my professional life heard a false rumour about me, and has accepted this falsehood as truth. The falsehood injured her feelings and made her question my integrity. Her reaction has unfortunately done the same to me.
Be nice people!
I've just had my own "chinese whisper" experience, and it hurts.
Suffice it to say that someone (who I thought would know better!) I know from my professional life heard a false rumour about me, and has accepted this falsehood as truth. The falsehood injured her feelings and made her question my integrity. Her reaction has unfortunately done the same to me.
Be nice people!
Friday, May 02, 2008
My baby girl is 9
A quick one to celebrate a fun and successful day.
Ms A is 9 today! She celebrated by having a sleepover last night with her two best friends, and then had 5 more friends join for a casual party today.
I admit I was concerned about how smoothly it would go, as I hadn't had the time to prepare as much as I had wanted. It was also a little sad as DH couldn't be with us.
The party went fine. It was refreshing to see that a "no frills", "back to basics" party is still OK. It seems that birthday "events" are "de rigeur" ... at least here, where expats tend to have high disposable incomes, and (as much as we don't like to admit it) get sucked into that whole "kiasu" mindset that is prevalent in Singapore.
One of the funny things was hearing the girls have their midnight chat. There was already "boy talk" ... who do you like, etc. It was still tinged with the whole "boy germs" thing, but it's a bit scary to think that Ms A is getting to that stage in her life already.
The cliche is so apt - they DO grow up too fast.
Our other news, DH bought Ms A a HUGE bday present: our new home! Yay! Offer has been accepted. Things are starting to fall into place.
Ms A is 9 today! She celebrated by having a sleepover last night with her two best friends, and then had 5 more friends join for a casual party today.
I admit I was concerned about how smoothly it would go, as I hadn't had the time to prepare as much as I had wanted. It was also a little sad as DH couldn't be with us.
The party went fine. It was refreshing to see that a "no frills", "back to basics" party is still OK. It seems that birthday "events" are "de rigeur" ... at least here, where expats tend to have high disposable incomes, and (as much as we don't like to admit it) get sucked into that whole "kiasu" mindset that is prevalent in Singapore.
One of the funny things was hearing the girls have their midnight chat. There was already "boy talk" ... who do you like, etc. It was still tinged with the whole "boy germs" thing, but it's a bit scary to think that Ms A is getting to that stage in her life already.
The cliche is so apt - they DO grow up too fast.
Our other news, DH bought Ms A a HUGE bday present: our new home! Yay! Offer has been accepted. Things are starting to fall into place.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Breathe
It will all get done. It will work out in the end. Go with the flow, and don't fight it. It may not all get done perfectly, but it will get done.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Where is my phone???
It has to be in the house.
But where?
And why is it ringing out as engaged when I call it from the home phone as I attempt to locate it from it's ring?
I am pulling my hair out in despair,as I can't find my mobile phone. I emailed DH this morning who confirmed I sms'd him last night - and I haven't been out of the house since.
It's worrying that it rings as "engaged" when I try to call it. I would have thought even if it has done it's usual trick of switching itself off, it would divert calls to voicemail. I've searched through this messy house from top to bottom, and am now worrying that MrM's latest trick of packing things away may have gone one step too far. Hopefully not as far as the garbage bin...
It is frustrating because I NEED my phone right now. We only have a few more weeks before we move, and I have so much stuff going on and have given that number to so many people...
Just this morning, we sent out Ms A's birthday invitations using my number as the contact/rsvp number. She won't be happy.
But where?
And why is it ringing out as engaged when I call it from the home phone as I attempt to locate it from it's ring?
I am pulling my hair out in despair,as I can't find my mobile phone. I emailed DH this morning who confirmed I sms'd him last night - and I haven't been out of the house since.
It's worrying that it rings as "engaged" when I try to call it. I would have thought even if it has done it's usual trick of switching itself off, it would divert calls to voicemail. I've searched through this messy house from top to bottom, and am now worrying that MrM's latest trick of packing things away may have gone one step too far. Hopefully not as far as the garbage bin...
It is frustrating because I NEED my phone right now. We only have a few more weeks before we move, and I have so much stuff going on and have given that number to so many people...
Just this morning, we sent out Ms A's birthday invitations using my number as the contact/rsvp number. She won't be happy.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Thanks kids!
I don't know what I did to deserve it, but my kids made me breakfast this morning. I thought DH must have had a hand in it, as after he called last night MrT came and told me I could sleep in and he would make me breakfast. Ms A then got all involved and wanted to create a menu etc and took away some of the glory from MrT.
In the end I told them my preferences for breakfast (and the fact that I didn't want it in bed!) and we came up with contingencies for if MrM woke up early and I was still sleeping in. It was lovely. Cornflakes and fruit never tasted so good!
In the end I told them my preferences for breakfast (and the fact that I didn't want it in bed!) and we came up with contingencies for if MrM woke up early and I was still sleeping in. It was lovely. Cornflakes and fruit never tasted so good!
Sunday, April 13, 2008
First steps ... at long last
Mr M is walking. Yay!! It seems like it has taken him forever to get from the cruising furniture, lurching between objects stage, but as of Thursday he is now walking the length of the room unassisted. He of course thinks it is a big joke, and loves the reaction we all give him when he takes a long walk. He still prefers to crawl, as it so much faster and I guess feels more secure for him. I can't remember how long it takes before walking (and running - gasp!) becomes number one after those tentative first steps.
I am so relived it happened before the weekend, so DH could see it. We packed him up and sent him off to Sydney last night to start his new job. He is also tasked with the jobs of finding us a house and school while I stay back here and try to sort and purge our belongings before they get crammed into a shipping container in 7wks. Please Lord, Grant me the patience to get through these next weeks alone with the kids without (wishing) Killing them!!
I am so relived it happened before the weekend, so DH could see it. We packed him up and sent him off to Sydney last night to start his new job. He is also tasked with the jobs of finding us a house and school while I stay back here and try to sort and purge our belongings before they get crammed into a shipping container in 7wks. Please Lord, Grant me the patience to get through these next weeks alone with the kids without (wishing) Killing them!!
Wednesday, March 05, 2008
Hot Water
Oh, how I appreciate hot water!!!
We finally had the switch for our hot water system repaired last night. After 3 days of cold showers, it was long overdue. To celebrate the kids had a big, foamy bubblebath.
I got up extra early this morning for a nice long shower.
There are many things I will miss about Singapore. The lack of available hot water on call is not one of them!
We finally had the switch for our hot water system repaired last night. After 3 days of cold showers, it was long overdue. To celebrate the kids had a big, foamy bubblebath.
I got up extra early this morning for a nice long shower.
There are many things I will miss about Singapore. The lack of available hot water on call is not one of them!
Monday, March 03, 2008
It's March!!!
What a whirlwind the last few months have been.
Key events:
* US Trip and CHA
* MrM's first birthday
* MrT's 6th B'day and first "real" party
* Ongoing planning re "the move"
We had an amazing 3 wks in California. 2 weeks play, 1 week work. I can moan about how much it cost, but in reality I'm glad we did it, as it will probably be our last family holiday for quite some time. It's disappointing that we didn't make it to Disneyland - especially as we were staying less than 1/2 a mile from the park - but I commend DH for sticking to his guns, saying that we had been to Tokyo Disney, and there is so much more to do in SoCal.
We started in San Francisco, which was lovely (and cold and rainy), however our stay was marred by food poisoning. I succombed first, then MrT, then MsA, finally D. Poor MrT had it bad and was sick all over MsA in bed, and was sick in the car all the next day (thankfully we had vomit bags!!).
We took a very bizarre route leaving SF: north to Muir Woods, then back across the city to Yosemite, then back to San Jose before heading down Highway 1. We stayed in a lovely Queen Anne style B&B at a tiny town called Groveland, outside Yosemite park. We didn't get far into the park cos there was so much snow. We stopped and had snowplay for about 1/2 hr (with Mr M sleeping away in the car) before heading back. I would LOVE to go back there in the Spring/Summer to see the real landscape and go hiking.
The coast road was stunning. I wasn't sure about the merits of taking the "1" all the way - but I'm glad we did. In addition to the natural beauty of the coastline, the other big wonder we saw was Hearst Castle. I thought the kids might have been bored here, but they loved it too. What a decadent time, and what a decadent man!
We drove straight through LA (on a Saturday evening - not the BEST time to do it), to Carlsbad. The Pinnacle of the trip for the kids followed: LEGOLAND!!! It was fun, and I loved seeing the pure JOY on MrT's face. He isn't really a child who has great passions, and because he is my "quiet child" he does seem to get dragged along to places that he may not be interested in - but at least I know he won't complain (unlike MsA!). He was in HEAVEN at Legoland! In the end, that was the only theme park we went to this trip (plans to do more in San Diego were hampered by bad weather), but I am sure he will remember it for a long time :)
There ended the leisure aspect of the trip. We had to drive back up to Anaheim for the work to start at CHA. I'll post about that another time ...this was such a long one!!
Key events:
* US Trip and CHA
* MrM's first birthday
* MrT's 6th B'day and first "real" party
* Ongoing planning re "the move"
We had an amazing 3 wks in California. 2 weeks play, 1 week work. I can moan about how much it cost, but in reality I'm glad we did it, as it will probably be our last family holiday for quite some time. It's disappointing that we didn't make it to Disneyland - especially as we were staying less than 1/2 a mile from the park - but I commend DH for sticking to his guns, saying that we had been to Tokyo Disney, and there is so much more to do in SoCal.
We started in San Francisco, which was lovely (and cold and rainy), however our stay was marred by food poisoning. I succombed first, then MrT, then MsA, finally D. Poor MrT had it bad and was sick all over MsA in bed, and was sick in the car all the next day (thankfully we had vomit bags!!).
We took a very bizarre route leaving SF: north to Muir Woods, then back across the city to Yosemite, then back to San Jose before heading down Highway 1. We stayed in a lovely Queen Anne style B&B at a tiny town called Groveland, outside Yosemite park. We didn't get far into the park cos there was so much snow. We stopped and had snowplay for about 1/2 hr (with Mr M sleeping away in the car) before heading back. I would LOVE to go back there in the Spring/Summer to see the real landscape and go hiking.
The coast road was stunning. I wasn't sure about the merits of taking the "1" all the way - but I'm glad we did. In addition to the natural beauty of the coastline, the other big wonder we saw was Hearst Castle. I thought the kids might have been bored here, but they loved it too. What a decadent time, and what a decadent man!
We drove straight through LA (on a Saturday evening - not the BEST time to do it), to Carlsbad. The Pinnacle of the trip for the kids followed: LEGOLAND!!! It was fun, and I loved seeing the pure JOY on MrT's face. He isn't really a child who has great passions, and because he is my "quiet child" he does seem to get dragged along to places that he may not be interested in - but at least I know he won't complain (unlike MsA!). He was in HEAVEN at Legoland! In the end, that was the only theme park we went to this trip (plans to do more in San Diego were hampered by bad weather), but I am sure he will remember it for a long time :)
There ended the leisure aspect of the trip. We had to drive back up to Anaheim for the work to start at CHA. I'll post about that another time ...this was such a long one!!
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Did I miss Christmas??
As you can no doubt imagine, I've been a bit preoccupied lately.
I've been stressing about the move - however must say I am now a lot happier about it; stressing about telling the kids; stressing about CHA; ... in general, just stressing!!
My body was starting to protest and I succumbed to a cold that had been hanging around home. I'm not sure why/how things started to improve, but they did. I think it just helps some time to surrender to the reality of a situation, admit there is no point holding on to the past or future dreams, and pray for strength and guidance to get through it!
So Christmas came and went with little fanfare this year. Christmas eve was nice, as we went to church and I made sausage rolls from scratch. I don't know what it is with sausage rolls - it's definately not a traditional Christmas food, but it has always been a tradition in my (parents) family. It felt good to make something that made me feel closer to "home".
Oh, on the "homefront" we told our families about our impending move. My dad ended up sobbing uncontrollably on the phone. I had to ring back a little later to make sure he was able to tell mum the news.
We told the kids on boxing day. MrT was fine. He just wanted to know if he could play footy at his new school. MsA, as expected, didn't take the news quite so well. All was OK though when she found out that we might be able to get a dog in our new home.
Giftwise, we were more conservative this year, as we knew we would spend big on our holiday. I probably received the most!! A new digicam for use on our US trip and $USD for personal spending (ie not for the kids or for work). WooHoo!
I've been stressing about the move - however must say I am now a lot happier about it; stressing about telling the kids; stressing about CHA; ... in general, just stressing!!
My body was starting to protest and I succumbed to a cold that had been hanging around home. I'm not sure why/how things started to improve, but they did. I think it just helps some time to surrender to the reality of a situation, admit there is no point holding on to the past or future dreams, and pray for strength and guidance to get through it!
So Christmas came and went with little fanfare this year. Christmas eve was nice, as we went to church and I made sausage rolls from scratch. I don't know what it is with sausage rolls - it's definately not a traditional Christmas food, but it has always been a tradition in my (parents) family. It felt good to make something that made me feel closer to "home".
Oh, on the "homefront" we told our families about our impending move. My dad ended up sobbing uncontrollably on the phone. I had to ring back a little later to make sure he was able to tell mum the news.
We told the kids on boxing day. MrT was fine. He just wanted to know if he could play footy at his new school. MsA, as expected, didn't take the news quite so well. All was OK though when she found out that we might be able to get a dog in our new home.
Giftwise, we were more conservative this year, as we knew we would spend big on our holiday. I probably received the most!! A new digicam for use on our US trip and $USD for personal spending (ie not for the kids or for work). WooHoo!
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
always the same: always changing!
How many times have I started a post with a comment along the lines of "how quickly things change"?
Yep, you guessed it. Major changes afoot. I think I just need to accept that the world keeps turning, presenting new situations all the time. There is no such thing as "being still".
Our news: we are moving back to Australia.
Let's just say that I was unprepared for this situation. I have finally (after 5 solid days) stopped crying.
The whole situation firmly put me back in the traditional expat family role of "trailing spouse". For the first few days I was constantly defiant and opposed every issue related to repatriating. All I could think of was that DH was thinking only of himself, he hadn't considered how it would impact the family. I saw nothing positive in making the move in the timeframe and conditions that work demanded.
Today I seemed to have turned a corner. I'm able to see positive aspects. I'm not as terrified as I was about how hard this will be for the kids. We have decided we will tell the kids at Christmas. It's going to be hard, as we don't have a definite schedule yet, and that will worry MsA. I've already broached the subject with MrT and he was fine.
I think I'm the one who is making a big deal out of it, and will have the toughest time!
Yep, you guessed it. Major changes afoot. I think I just need to accept that the world keeps turning, presenting new situations all the time. There is no such thing as "being still".
Our news: we are moving back to Australia.
Let's just say that I was unprepared for this situation. I have finally (after 5 solid days) stopped crying.
The whole situation firmly put me back in the traditional expat family role of "trailing spouse". For the first few days I was constantly defiant and opposed every issue related to repatriating. All I could think of was that DH was thinking only of himself, he hadn't considered how it would impact the family. I saw nothing positive in making the move in the timeframe and conditions that work demanded.
Today I seemed to have turned a corner. I'm able to see positive aspects. I'm not as terrified as I was about how hard this will be for the kids. We have decided we will tell the kids at Christmas. It's going to be hard, as we don't have a definite schedule yet, and that will worry MsA. I've already broached the subject with MrT and he was fine.
I think I'm the one who is making a big deal out of it, and will have the toughest time!
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
It's a rainy, grey day. Yay!
Today the weather is dismal. It's been overcast and grey all day. I don't like having the lights on during the day (a frugal/penny-pinching quirk of mine), but today it has been necessary.
The rain didn't start until about 10am, and it seems to have set in. It looks like I won't get to the library to return our books after all (oh no, a fine! the penny pincher in me is really getting a workout today!).
I'm so loving the bad weather though. It's the kind of day that you just want to snuggle up in bed with a hot chocolate and read a trashy novel. We don't get days like this in Singapore. When it rains it is usually a tropical downpour. It clears quickly, the sun comes out, the humidity rises, and that's that. Today it is like early winter gentle showers in southern Australia.
Don't get me wrong, I don't want it to stay like this for a week or more (as has happened the last few years we have gone back to Oz for long school break). Just for now it is perfect. It was cool enough to indulge in a hot chocolate. I've had such a draining few weeks that this weather suits my mood perfectly ... and as strange as it sounds, seeing the mood/weather match is actually making me feel more positive and energetic. I'm ready to take on the world again!
The rain didn't start until about 10am, and it seems to have set in. It looks like I won't get to the library to return our books after all (oh no, a fine! the penny pincher in me is really getting a workout today!).
I'm so loving the bad weather though. It's the kind of day that you just want to snuggle up in bed with a hot chocolate and read a trashy novel. We don't get days like this in Singapore. When it rains it is usually a tropical downpour. It clears quickly, the sun comes out, the humidity rises, and that's that. Today it is like early winter gentle showers in southern Australia.
Don't get me wrong, I don't want it to stay like this for a week or more (as has happened the last few years we have gone back to Oz for long school break). Just for now it is perfect. It was cool enough to indulge in a hot chocolate. I've had such a draining few weeks that this weather suits my mood perfectly ... and as strange as it sounds, seeing the mood/weather match is actually making me feel more positive and energetic. I'm ready to take on the world again!
Sunday, November 18, 2007
soooo tired
I'm tired. I'm doing the single parent thing again as DH is off on yet another work trip. They seem to be more frequent and for longer periods than previously. While it's frustrating that he does the disappearing act so often it doesn't get annoying until the trip extends beyond 1 week.
I think I've worked it out now:
* overnight trips - no impact. No different to working late, band practice/gig etc
* 2-4 nights - laid back, treat the kids to junk food, make no plans
* 5-9 nights - fall behind in housework. Start to feel tired.
* 10 nights - resentment sets in. How dare he leave me to look after everything? Didn't have kids to be single parent etc. Start to yell at kids.
* 11-13 nights - Body starts to show signs of stress, get sick etc
* 14+ nights - autopilot. Somehow things get done. Not entirely sure of passing of time. Occasional "second winds" only to crash and burn quickly.
Thankfully we have only had a couple of 2+wks trips. Usually I've had plenty of warning of them and can try and conserve energy to get through it. The last couple of trips though have been extended while he has been away. That's hard to deal with.
This trip has been 13 nights. He comes home tomorrow night. Yay! As if on cue I can feel that I'm succombing to some bug. Yesterday and today I have been absolutley dead on my feet, sore throat, all achy etc. Time to OD on vitamins! Time to sleep!!
I think I've worked it out now:
* overnight trips - no impact. No different to working late, band practice/gig etc
* 2-4 nights - laid back, treat the kids to junk food, make no plans
* 5-9 nights - fall behind in housework. Start to feel tired.
* 10 nights - resentment sets in. How dare he leave me to look after everything? Didn't have kids to be single parent etc. Start to yell at kids.
* 11-13 nights - Body starts to show signs of stress, get sick etc
* 14+ nights - autopilot. Somehow things get done. Not entirely sure of passing of time. Occasional "second winds" only to crash and burn quickly.
Thankfully we have only had a couple of 2+wks trips. Usually I've had plenty of warning of them and can try and conserve energy to get through it. The last couple of trips though have been extended while he has been away. That's hard to deal with.
This trip has been 13 nights. He comes home tomorrow night. Yay! As if on cue I can feel that I'm succombing to some bug. Yesterday and today I have been absolutley dead on my feet, sore throat, all achy etc. Time to OD on vitamins! Time to sleep!!
Monday, October 22, 2007
Positive
How quick moods can change.
Gotta love DH.
I spoke with him this afternoon about my concerns regarding the biz, budget blowout etc.
Talk about a pep talk!
He really lifted me up and affirmed what I was doing which made me feel great.
Gotta love DH.
I spoke with him this afternoon about my concerns regarding the biz, budget blowout etc.
Talk about a pep talk!
He really lifted me up and affirmed what I was doing which made me feel great.
Negative
Negative bank balance, negative physical space, negative head space.
Get the idea?
Just finished a FFC meeting where we nutted out our budget for CHA ... scary. Budget has pretty much doubled what we initially thought it would be. All those incidentals like electricity, floor coverings etc that you (or at least I) would think would be included in the cost of a booth at a large convention hall add up. I'm not sure how I will explain this to DH as I beg and grovel for more money to finance this whole exploit. I'm feeling the pressure to return to "real work" ie one that has regular income so as to fund this biz. I don't want to do that, but I know our family budget is facing a squeeze as it is. I don't want to bail from FFC either, so I'm not sure what to do ... maybe I can become minority partner instead of equal partner ... I think it's that or I'll have to seriously consider terminating our arrangement all together.
The squeeze is on in terms of floorspace at home too. DH started "cleaning up" which involved taking things out of the wardrobe and piling them in the storeroom. That would not normally be a bad thing except that the storeroom will any day become home to a pallet load of cardstock. We had talked about finding warehouse space but decided against it as it would be yet another "regular outgoing" without having seen ANY incoming, regular or not!
All this is putting me in a pretty black mood. I had been very excited as we had finally decided to make CHA into a family trip, but now I don't know if we can afford it. The alternative would be to fly either one of our parents over to babysit while Dean works. Oh, and of course our lease expires at that time too, and with the market the way it is we expect a HEFTY increase.
Sigh.
Get the idea?
Just finished a FFC meeting where we nutted out our budget for CHA ... scary. Budget has pretty much doubled what we initially thought it would be. All those incidentals like electricity, floor coverings etc that you (or at least I) would think would be included in the cost of a booth at a large convention hall add up. I'm not sure how I will explain this to DH as I beg and grovel for more money to finance this whole exploit. I'm feeling the pressure to return to "real work" ie one that has regular income so as to fund this biz. I don't want to do that, but I know our family budget is facing a squeeze as it is. I don't want to bail from FFC either, so I'm not sure what to do ... maybe I can become minority partner instead of equal partner ... I think it's that or I'll have to seriously consider terminating our arrangement all together.
The squeeze is on in terms of floorspace at home too. DH started "cleaning up" which involved taking things out of the wardrobe and piling them in the storeroom. That would not normally be a bad thing except that the storeroom will any day become home to a pallet load of cardstock. We had talked about finding warehouse space but decided against it as it would be yet another "regular outgoing" without having seen ANY incoming, regular or not!
All this is putting me in a pretty black mood. I had been very excited as we had finally decided to make CHA into a family trip, but now I don't know if we can afford it. The alternative would be to fly either one of our parents over to babysit while Dean works. Oh, and of course our lease expires at that time too, and with the market the way it is we expect a HEFTY increase.
Sigh.
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