Monday, October 31, 2005

The things we do...

...for love... not necessarily of our partner, but for our fave hobby!

In a moment of pure insanity I decided to go to Melbourne the weekend before last for a arts exhibition/convention.
I caught the overnight flight on Wednesday, travelled a couple of hrs by train to spend thurs and Fri with my parents, bussed it back to melbourne saturday morning (as the trains were off), shopped and socialised madly for two days, flew back sunday night and showed up bright and early for work on monday!
It was an opportunity to blow my hard earned first pay cheque. Boy, did I achieve that! Spent way more than I intended. Have no excuse not to spend more time on my art as I have so many supplies and new toys to play wih now.
I just need to find time to use them. Still haven't unpacked as had the most hectic week at work, and still trying to finish off a couple of reports.

Sunday, October 30, 2005

a walk in the park

I've been dying to spend some quality time with DH. We are both really tired and busy at the moment and it feels like forever since we took some time out for ourselves.
We just had a really nice picnic lunch at the BBQ areas downstairs. I would have loved to have just walked aimlessly hand in hand and talk about everything and nothing. I tried to think about the last time we did that ... it hasn't happened since we had kids, 6+ yrs ago. No wonder we are drifting apart. We haven't found a time or place to "connect".
Our first "special" place when we were dating was Petersham Park. We used to go for walks there at night, and just sit by the rotunda and share our dreams. We did go a couple of times when the kids were small to sit and watch the baseball games. This was definately a happy place.
Another place was the beach and cliffs around Coogee. This tended to be a place we went to when we wanted to reflect on something. Lots of icecream, hugs and tears shared.

Ohh, what I would give to find a Petersham Park here!!!

Saturday, October 15, 2005

I've made a decision

I'm so happy. I have made a decision - not telling you though!
I'm now at peace with work/family/home etc. I've had some time to reflect on what my real desires are, regardless of circumstances/surroundings. Now I know what is possible and what direction I see my life going.
Time to rejoice in finding the way to my personal fulfillment.
I'm going to try and keep my mouth shut for a while. Both DH and I have a some time apart due to travel at the moment. I am going to wait until we can sit down together to discuss this. This is not the time for impulsive decisons, ultimatums, or scare tactics.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005


Another downside of me working is that it means we have no choice to have a live in domestic helper/nanny. In Singapore this is a very common occurrence and many of the western expats that come here jump at the chance to handover some of the more mundane household chores and childcare to someone else.

We have had Liza with us for a year. She is very efficient and the kids love her .... I on the otherhand still can't get used to sharing my home with another person. And I'm not a good boss! I need to learn how to communicate better with her. She continues to do some tasks in ways that really annoy me, but I can't seem to get this message across.

I nearly lost it tonight. We splurged and asked Liza to pick up take away pizza and while she was waiting to get the bread and milk for tomorrow. She came home with raisin bread (our w'end breakfast treat), no regular bread(!) AND carrying the pizza hanging sideways in the bag. It is not the first time we have had pizza. She knows that you carry the box FLAT. Thankfully the pizza base was a thin, crispy one, so the whole thing didn't collapse ... just a few "squashed pieces".

Can't believe how worked up I got about this. In the big scheme of things it was nothing. But add it to the other little "niggles"which I have spoken to her about before, like leaving boiling water unattended on the stove, not maintaining basic supply of milk and bread, not waiting for a full load for the washer/dryer, etc and my frustration level is oh so high! If only DH and I hadn't agreed that I would work for a while so we could afford to have another baby without changing our lifestyle. Cos, much to the shock of many of the expats here I think I could happily change my lifestyle to one that didn't involve a live in maid!

Moaning already

Knew it wouldn't take long .... moaning already about being a working woman!

I am SOOOO tired!!!! I love the work I am doing - but it is taking all my energy. I need to get work fitness!

Yesterday I had a great day at work. Probably my best day at GSS. All the kids were really responsive - no biting/screaming/crying/running away/zoning out. I then caught a taxi straight to the clinic to see a client for a coworker on AL, and that session went well too.

Just frustrating that I left the house at 8am, didn't get home til 5.30pm. I know that this is a normal day for millions of people ... I miss my kids though, and don't think I should be away from them for that long. I felt sorry for MsA: it was her first day of school holidays and I was working. MrT still gets upset with me being away for so long.

Remember, I am working because I WANT to - not because I HAVE to. I think I will just have to be more strict on limiting my hours. Not saying "yes" to every offer of additional work. Although, I did just get my first month's pay cheque ... and that is definately a motivator to continue working. See it's not all bad!